Compare Notes

“Hello, we’re planning a get together. Come along. We can relive the good old times”, boomed Mr. Achuthan from the other end.

“Why not? Who else is coming”, asked Dad.

“Oh! The Menons, the Arvindakshans, the Nalinakshans, The Sudhakarans and the Surendrans.”

“And Hemachandran?”

“No. His mother in law is not doing fine.”

“Let me call him up”

Before I go further, this presumed get together was for some retired fellows most of them free with kids married and settled in far off places within India or in some foreign country.

“Hello, Hemachandran? Ah! Why are you not coming over for the get together? You ask your brother in law to manage for a day, no?”

“Eeek! Should one bother?”

“Bother about what?”

“What can we do? A pack of oldies who can’t drink or smoke or eat their fill? Compare notes on how much sugar one has or pressure? Or talk about the pains and aches? Iam not coming!”

Dad broke out laughing. A call to Hemachandran always makes you laugh.

KK's singing mania



KK: Aee mere...humsafar..........(singing)

Cappuccino looks up from her computer

Cappuccino: Did you say something?

KK: No, I was singing..Didn’t you hear?

Cappuccino: Er..No..not really

KK: Aee mere...humsafar..........Ek zaaaaraaaaaaaaaa
Cappuccino smiles weakly. Latte manoeuvres towards the duo.

Latte: What is happening here? Why are you talking like that KK? And that too in Hindi?

KK: [With a look of disbelief on her face] What?? I AM SINGING!

Latte: [Looking alarmed] Really??

KK: Of course!!!! Listen.. [Resumes singing]
Latte and Cappuccino exchange troubled glances. Espresso approaches.

Espresso: Girls, come on, we can have tea

Cappuccino and Latte: YES! [Scramble to their feet and walk fast towards the cafeteria with KK right behind]
Everyone with their cup of tea. Tranquillity. Everyone entranced by the silence.
Suddenly...

KK: Aee mere...humsafar..........Ek zaaaaraaaaaaaaaa...

Latte and Cappuccino: OH NOOOO!!!

Espresso: What the hell!!!!

KK: [Ignores everyone’s looks and continues singing and taps the glass with the ring on her finger, in tune with the song]

Espresso: What happened to you?

KK: [Stops suddenly and looks Espresso up and down] Why? Can’t I sing??

Espresso: No, if it is like this, you can’t!

Cappuccino: If you stop singing, we will buy you anything you like!

KK: [Slightly interested]Really? Like what?

Latte: Hmm..peanuts??

KK: Peanuts??? Couldn't you have offered me something better??

Latte gives her classic sheepish grin.

KK:[Who had a generous mind] Ok, then I will stop singing..And I won’t be cracking any jokes either. Let us see how you survive when I am quiet.. And get me the peanuts...[Mumbling] Hmph can’t even give me a good deal..

Cappuccino:[With a look of relief] Ok, cool!
[KK keeps her promise. After some quiet minutes, everyone gets this feeling that something is not quite right.]

Espresso: Ok KK, stop it! You sing or talk or do whatever you like...

KK: AHA! GREAT! I knew it! This is the deal I am talking about

Cappuccino: [To Latte] I will put on my ear plugs

Latte: And I will assume that somebody is talking to herself

KK: Aee mere...humsafar..........Ek zaaaaraaaaaaaaaa...
[Espresso shakes her head and gulps down the tea]




-Latte

Humour strikes a chord with joblessness and absolute boredom

We’re trying hard to laugh. Well, most of the time. We think if we’re not funny, or if we don’t understand if someone else is funny, we’re not part of the “team”.

We strike animated conversations (exaggerated expressions and hand gestures) assuming that we’re visible only to the equally mad teammates and invisible to the rest of the office.

We fish for comments (read compliments), both offline and online. Offline, by trumpeting our day’s achievements…errr…tasks (which goes like – “my maid’s away and I had to get up early to prepare breakfast and lunch for my daughter” – and I pray they don’t ask “what did you make” – but they do – and I had to cough up the truth with a sheepish grin – “cheese sandwich for breakfast, cheese & shredded chicken sandwich for lunch” – and shredded chicken was the leftover-reheated version of my maid’s chicken dish, btw!). Online, by literally taking out a begging bowl and loafing from one blog to another, leaving traces of our footprints, so that they trace it back to ours and leave a nice comment, whether they like it or not.

Coming back to the topic of humour and how it connects with joblessness and boredom…The recession did it, I tell you. We were neck deep in work until then. We took the fourth person on board, because we couldn’t handle the endless jobs that came in with deadlines like “yesterday”. And then, recession came in. After which, new work hardly came in.

The joblessness is driving us up the wall. We’re sinking deep into boredom. Most often, we go searching for matchsticks to keep our eyes open, especially after lunch time. Now we’re waiting for the teeny-weeny morsels (any job – even if it’s just editing content) to be thrown our way, like wet-behind-the-ears puppies, eager to lap up anything that comes our way.

We throw in the humour just to keep our spirits up. We laugh at pretty much anything, even if remotely funny. I make funny faces & funny sounds (they join in) and narrate incidents at home – which primarily revolve around my 2 children (presuming that “they” are enjoying every minute of it). The 2 big time dreamers of the team narrate weird dreams and nightmares with each or any of us playing the weirdest part in it and I naively ask “how do you remember your dream so distinctly, when try as much as I do, fail to bring even 1 dream successfully to the table?”. She sings, nay croons, nay raps …jeez, I give up…she thinks she sings and expects a standing ovation. We keep the spirit up. We play our part. We give her a standing ovation. We laugh. We disperse. But we’re back after the short break. To continue our long, jobless, boring day with our self-amusing jokes, dreams, stories, songs…and other such nonsense.

-Espresso

A note to the boss: We’re not really jobless. Please do not throw us out of our jobs. We’re actually researching websites to improve our writing skills (like hell!).

To the girls: I was just trying to be funny!

To others: I’ve hyped up the ‘joblessness’ and ‘boredom’ bit - a bit, to make it sound a bit exciting. We’re not really that jobless, maybe just a bit.

Rolling pins

It’s a small world. Everything and everyone is related to one another in ways more than one. Let’s just take the case of the rolling pin. Used universally in kitchens, this unassuming invention has found many uses.
  • For making Rotis, pancakes, etc: Very useful info, isn’t it?

  • As a Perfect stopper to drain cooked rice when used with a small cup.

  • For Getting your way:At home, you can always use this gadget to get your way. Just threaten to send as missile to anyone who has a different idea.

  • For the Keralite:One can always use it to push the steamed puttu out.( a delicacy steam cooked in longish container)

  • And for Content writing: If you are given a line like the company is into logistics, you meditate and chant the Rolling pin mantra. And lo and Behold- you have a whole page of profile ready, spread from the wisp of information.


KK